Thinking back on all the moments I have had to step up to protect or speak up for my children gives me all the feels. Ugh, and if I knew then what I know now, I would have been even more aggressive. I did the best with what I knew and experienced at the moment, and I hope you can give yourself the grace to believe the same if you have any regrets.
My goal is to encourage you to find similarities and search for your strength and power to be your family's best advocate.
My son was admitted to the hospital after my sweet, laid-back 15-month-old had a winter cold that turned into pneumonia. It went quickly from cough to pulling for breath. Very scary day for me. As I was still breastfeeding once a day, I could stay in the room with him. Good thing I hadn't weaned at 12 months as I had planned!
While in the hospital, he was getting breathing treatments every two or three hours, but it wasn't helping enough. It was November, and the peds ward was busy for the respiratory therapist. He was focused on getting from room to room, hardly looking me in the face, or speaking to anyone. Maybe he was having a bad day. That might have stopped me from "bothering" him before I had children, but my son needed more help. I didn't care if that man was busy or sad or whatever.
After a breathing treatment failed to stop his breathing struggle, he started to walk out of the room, but I called him back. I said, "it didn't work. My son needs something else. Now."
The therapist said, "I can't authorize that."
"But he needs help."
"There's nothing else I can do."
"He can't BREATHE!"
He finally looks me in the eyes and realizes I mean business and that my son wasn't doing as well as he may have thought. "Well, if his doctor recommends it, he can get continuous albuterol but will have to be moved to the PICU" (Pediatric ICU).
"Yes, let's get that done. When can we move him?"
Surprisingly, they found a bed in the PICU for us in under 30 minutes and started the treatments that had him so much improved in 2 days that he was discharged.
If I had just sat back, allowing the "experts" to treat my son as they saw fit, we could have been in the hospital for much longer or gotten into an even worse situation. I don't want to dwell on that, only on the blessings of breastfeeding, and the strength God gave me at that moment.
It really doesn't take much to be an advocate. Put your foot down firmly, ask ALL the questions (write everything down and WHO said what), and don't fade into the background. Your family, your goal, your focus is on one person. These doctors/nurses/therapists are humans who get overwhelmed.
Take the initiative to get what your person needs. You have permission to become the Mama or Papa bear that will growl until you get your way. Be the researcher that finds natural solutions in diet and remedies that work even better than what the doctor gives you. Look to your intuition to find answers. You don't have to rely on other people for every situation. You are capable and smart.
I give you permission to be the squeakiest wheel or most annoying parent ever - if you need it.
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I'm with you on this journey. Blessings!
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